Stories of Wil: The Gift

Wil and his friend Lila enjoy similar activities–sometimes.

Submitted by Christie Taylor

Wil is a 13-year-old boy with Down syndrome. He is the little brother, by 20 months, to twin sisters, Katherine and Elizabeth. Wil’s mom, Christie, knew very little about Down syndrome when Wil was diagnosed shortly after his birth. It didn’t take long for Christie to realize how enriching life with Down syndrome is. Embracing this newfound life, Christie was compelled to share her experiences with Wil. Christie’s desire, in sharing these stories, is to promote an awareness, understanding, and appreciation of the amazing capabilities of individuals with Down syndrome.

I watched Wil play ball with a group of typically developing boys. They fully included him and were very patient with his slower reaction times in catching and throwing the ball. Wil has great hand-eye coordination and athletic ability, considering his low muscle tone and cognitive delays; but even so, the gap in abilities is clear. When Wil grew tired of the game and walked off on his own volition, I could see the sense of relief in the boys’ faces. They could again play at their own faster-paced level. Though each of the boys varied in ability in their own way, the difference was not so great as with their friend who has Down syndrome.

When Wil’s friend, Lila Harvey, asked for a play date with him, I was just as thrilled as Wil. Even though their abilities varied greatly, I knew she simply asked for a play date with her friend because she enjoys spending time with him.

The play date started off well with games then lunch. That part is easy for just about anyone. But Wil doesn’t speak on the same level as Lila does, and his favorite television shows are “Paw Patrol” and “Doc McStuffins.”  Fine by her, we’ll just move on to something that doesn’t need an age limit. Let’s play Wil’s drums!

Then it was off to the hose and the slide in the backyard. Backyard hose fun is always equal playing ground. That is, until Wil sat at the top of the ladder and wouldn’t budge.

I have seen similar instances of this at the park. Wil has very little control over his environment. Everything and everyone moves so much faster than he does. So what would you do if you felt you had little control of your surroundings? If you could sit at the top of the slide and make everyone wait when they’re usually moving at warp speed ahead of you, wouldn’t you delight in making them wait? Just a little bit? So at the top of the slide, Wil sat, unbudging.

At the park, I see two types of reactions. Kids either “mother” and sweet talk Wil or they just wait until I come over and take care of the situation. But not Lila.

“Go down the slide, Wil!” She said it loudly and with authority. He gave her a look, saw that she meant it and down he went. She called his bluff!

You see, there is this delicate balance between being mean, being an enabler and understanding when someone is simply being a stinker.

She saw stinker and she called it — frank and to the point. The next moment, they were back to laughing and spraying each other with the hose.

It seems so simple and so typical from the outside looking in. But Wil is not always treated in that typical way. In some ways, he’s not typical, and people just don’t know what to do with that. So when I see something like this, I see it for the gift it is.

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by Marsha Chartrand

Marsha Johnson Chartrand, a founder, writer, and copy editor with the Manchester Mirror, is a 50-year resident of Manchester. She has a long history of volunteer and community involvement.