Letter to the editor: Teacher stunned and hurt by board decision
February 28, 2021
Every day, since Monday, I’ve planned to write this letter; however, my worries over saying “just the right thing,” or being “eloquent and politically correct” get in my way. Also, my feelings/emotions keep changing, as I think I’m going through a rapid fire experience of the stages of grief.
I love what I do, and I am passionate about teaching children. It is definitely a calling — not for the faint of heart. I have always felt so truly fortunate to work in this amazing community of families, and I always will. Throughout this past year of so many worries, anxieties, loss, loneliness, and the emotional roller coaster of it all… I feel like the schools, and the teachers have gone above and beyond to hold this community together, meet the needs of this community to the best of our ability, and have risen to the challenge and beyond. Why? It’s in our DNA. We cherish the relationships we make with the families and young people of this community, and we strive — every day — to support and care for them, often as an extension of our own family. We are truly unique in this “small community” feel, and I believe that makes us stronger.
Throughout this unprecedented time, we have tried to learn, grow and pivot so much I think I have whiplash. Personally, I was extremely frightened to go back in person in the fall. I knew; however, I would be much happier and more effective as a teacher, if we did. I truly LOVE being in the classroom face to face with students. They are the joy that makes the rigors of teaching so worthwhile and rewarding. The community asked for in-person opportunities, and we did our best to face our fears and meet this need. Others in our community were uncertain, and wanted to keep their children home in an environment that they could control. Once again, we met this need and faced a monumental challenge of teaching both in-person and remote students simultaneously. Many schools did not offer varying opportunities to families. If they DID offer the opportunity for choice, teachers were either completely given an in-person classroom or a virtual classroom. Whenever I share with other teachers around the state or country about our “hybrid” model, they are shocked, find it completely daunting to even imagine, and often don’t know how we’re making it happen. Sheer will and desire to do for our students and our families is how we’re doing it. But, we’re working harder than we’ve ever worked. This is my 26th year of teaching, and I’ve never worked as hard, worried as much, or felt as drained or depleted by attempting many new learning platforms, new curriculum to adapt to virtual and in-person, new protocols, new expectations, literally new EVERYTHING, to meet the needs of students and families. In a “normal” year, if you can truly have that, teaching is demanding and emotionally taxing work. We chose this, and we know this; however, nothing could prepare us all for this past year.
I have felt such support, understanding, and grace from my students and families, and I am extremely grateful. It has been challenging; however, I make a conscious effort to walk into our classroom with a positive attitude each day to share stories, learning, anxieties, sadness, fun, joy, curiosities, and so many emotions with 25 children that I adore. Yes, it’s my job to teach them; however, my main concern is that they feel safe, loved, and heard … especially during this troubling time. They are tired of wearing masks, but they do it like champs. They want “corona” to go away so they can have their lives back, their trips, their play dates, their time with family and friends. My personal mission this year has been to do the best I can to take care of myself emotionally, so that I can be fresh and joy-filled to greet my young friends Every. Single. Day. The Virtual Wednesdays have truly allowed for more of this to happen. I believe I speak for most teachers when we say, “Thank you.” Thank you for realizing that this has been beyond challenging. Thank you for allowing us to feel safer in deeply cleaned rooms; to have time to meet with virtual students: talk with them, laugh with them, hear their stories, share some small lessons without the crazy hubbub of the classroom around them – so the teacher can actually hear their voices. Most importantly, I want to CONNECT with them, as it’s such a different experience for them than the in-person students. This, I will greatly miss. Also, meeting with my colleagues and learning this new work together, supporting one another, growing closer, building trust and morale. This, I will greatly miss. Making appointments on Wednesday for my junior high daughter and myself so as not to miss in-person learning. This, I will greatly miss. Working with my district colleagues each Wednesday for 1.5 to 2 hours for our ELA meeting to determine the best new reading curriculum for our students. This, I will have to do after the long day’s work, tired and less focused, with even more on my plate to do.
Though I have felt, and continue to feel extremely supported by my classroom families and this community at large, I did not feel that same support and understanding from many of our School Board members. During the January meeting, our Klager staff prepared a video to share with the board to inform them of all that we are doing on these Wednesdays. Our administrator, Karin Villarreal, also shared all of the positive things that teachers do on these Wednesdays to meet the needs of both our in-person and remote learners. We provide instruction that continues for our students as they work a bit at home, so that we, as teachers, can make the most of this opportunity to meet, plan, make videos, meet with students individually and in groups. I think many of us work harder and longer on Wednesdays than any other day of the week! This was such “good will” from our School Board and community; allowing us a day to regroup, plan, and meet. We are doing two jobs each day. I run a race around my classroom to teach both in person and virtual students, to change modes of teaching to meet needs at the drop of a hat. By lunch, I often feel like I’ve done a four-hour aerobics class.
I am still confused as to the true NEED for a five day in-person/virtual week. I don’t feel it was made clear by our School Board as to the reasoning that this must happen NOW, as we have Covid variants becoming more prevalent, families who have made the best of Wednesdays for appointments, family time, rest/recuperation, and a variety of plans. Many of the families I’ve spoken with didn’t even realize there was a need or desire to go back to a five day week, as all seemed to be working well. Perhaps Dr. Bezeau and the board members have heard from many families with pressure and a push to return to five in-person days; however, we haven’t been made aware of this. At the beginning of Monday night’s School Board meeting I listened to articulate, driven students sharing their overwhelming support and desire to continue virtual Wednesdays for many purposeful reasons — namely mental health in this critical time. I listened to several of my colleagues, and previously (last month) to my administrator, on the benefits for meeting the needs of all students with our planning and reaching out to have TIME and face-to-face opportunities with our virtual students … practically begging our School Board to understand the efforts of the labor in teaching at this time in our society. It seemed very clear to me that the decision had ALREADY been made by much of our board, as I imagine decisions ARE in place before meetings; however, many of our board members didn’t even flinch when the vote was taken after hearing such meaningful and heartfelt concerns. I was very appreciative that a couple of our School Board members weighed in with their concerns after hearing from the students and staff before voting. Overall, I believe, many students and staff did not feel heard. In this small supportive community, many of the teachers and students took a collective, stunned breath, and felt HURT.
I am extremely grateful to have received my first dose of the Covid vaccine this Saturday. With only 40 some percent of our staff even having the opportunity to start the vaccination process, it also hurt to think that this did not seem to be regarded as a concern in making this decision. I will not have full immunity of the vaccine until mid-April, and I’m sure others are still waiting to start the process. Currently, many schools will not return to in-person until all of their teachers have been offered or received vaccinations. We have been working since September, with these anxieties in the back of our minds, as we march forward doing our best for our students and families. It is a substantially heavier weight than some may realize.
Thank you for taking time to listen to my feelings. This has been an emotionally draining week for so many of us. We will move forward, continue to do our best, and RISE as we have endeavored to do for the past year … always with students at the center of our focus and efforts.
Sincerely,
Heather Stommen
2nd Grade Teacher at L.C. Klager Elementary
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